Someone

In my other blog, ‘Someone’ has become a handy shorthand for the boyfriend I don’t have. The one who exists purely in my mind, laughs at me good-naturedly and tries to hide the fact that he adores me, likes the things that I like, challenges me, spends rainy sunday mornings companionably drinking coffee and reading [...]

Figaro

I just went home for the weekend to see the Marriage of Figaro. Hoped to catch up with a couple of people including some home friends and my grandmother, but our various plans fell through and instead I found myself going on a couple of beautiful walks with my family, which was great. Saw some [...]

Interesting Events

Quite apart from last night being the most bizarre evening I’ve spent in a long while, starting in a fantastic Eighties disco and going on to a fantastically seedy-shiny casino and then finally some random guys house, with the theft of a bowl of wasabi peas and many miniature adventures along the way, quite apart [...]

No. Absolutely Not.

Two months. Two whole months. But today, I’ll be honest, I feel awful. And bad days are happening more often, and it seems more and more of a given that they will all just run into one again, bad day after bad day after bad day, and I just cannot do this. I don’t have [...]

Retrospective Shocker.

Apparently when things got really bad last term my housemates were planning on ringing the health service and getting me transferred to Psych. 
It still surprises, shocks and terrifies me that I got to that point, where I wasn’t moving for hours on end, just staying in bed, waiting for time to pass. It never does. [...]

Consequences

I suppose it had to happen. If you miss a term of university – even if you were actually there, present, somehow, you still missed it because you spent half of it literally absent, in your room, staring at the wall, and the other half mentally absent, late, or elsewhere – there are bound to [...]

A Compliment…

…which I recieved yesterday. Not sure how seriously I was expected to take it (you really don’t want to hear the rest of this list) but according to a good friend of mine, C, he respects me, in his words:
because you are honest about your depression and because you keep trying at things when you think [...]

Things I Hadn’t Missed.

Over the last few days I’ve been a bit up and down, and I’m putting this down to a combination of PMS and the attempt to stop smoking. The thing is, when I was depressed, PMS just meant becoming super-depressed and horribly unhappy, at which point I would just retreat under the covers and wait [...]

Flying Out of my Comfort Zone

The one really odd thing is, despite being ostensibly fine, I’m still an incredibly timid person. There are so many things I’m scared to do, so many things I’ll never say, and I don’t have the confidence to believe in myself with regards to anything except that I am fairly intelligent and musical, and a [...]

Points with No Purpose

A couple of things to say today: (Annoyingly, this was written a few days ago – but my internet here is useless. And by a few days ago, I mean a week. I’ve been trying to post this every day…let’s see if it works today…)
Firstly, I discovered Points with Purpose [I'm trying to link this [...]